Have you ever felt like God is giving everyone else the one thing you want, but holding it back from you? The last four months have been emotionally draining. That is the only way I can think to describe it. Every month my heart shatters to the ground. I know it is so close but yet it feels so far away. Every time, I am reminded of this song by Nicole Nordeman. It is titled Gratitude and has beautiful lyrics that I am sure every one could relate too.
GRATITUDE:
Send some rain, would You send some rain?
‘Cause the earth is dry and needs to drink again
And the sun is high and we are sinking in the shade
Would You send a cloud, thunder long and loud?
Let the sky grow black and send some mercy down
Surely You can see that we are thirsty and afraid
But maybe not, not today
Maybe You’ll provide in other ways
And if that’s the case . . .
(Chorus)
We’ll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to thirst for You
How to bless the very sun that warms our face
If You never send us rain
Daily bread, give us daily bread
Bless our bodies, keep our children fed
Fill our cups, then fill them up again tonight
Wrap us up and warm us through
Tucked away beneath our sturdy roofs
Let us slumber safe from danger’s view this time
Or maybe not, not today
Maybe You’ll provide in other ways
And if that’s the case . . .
(Chorus)
We’ll give thanks to You
With gratitude
A lesson learned to hunger after You
That a starry sky offers a better view if no roof is overhead And if we never taste that bread
Oh, the differences that often are between
What we want and what we really need
So grant us peace, Jesus, grant us peace
Move our hearts to hear a single beat
Between alibis and enemies tonight
Or maybe not, not today
Peace might be another world away
And if that’s the case . . .
(Chorus)
We’ll give thanks to You
With gratitude
For lessons learned in how to trust in You
That we are blessed beyond what we could ever dream
In abundance or in need
And if You never grant us peace
But Jesus, would You please . . .
Ok God, I have been asking and praying to you for this one thing and You haven’t given it to me yet. I am trusting You even though it is hard to let You be in control
sometimes. Lord, help me to give thanks and gratitude to You for what you are providing me with right now. Thank you for giving Brantley and I more time to get to know each other. Thank you for allowing me to get healthier. Thank you for giving me a sweet baby girl to nurture and take care of everyday until I hold my own in my arms. Thank you for this time that Brantley and I have to get our finances in order.
A few weeks ago the preschoolers at church learned about Hannah from the Bible. They cut out a picture of a baby and colored it. Then they put a tag on it that said, To: Hannah From: God. One of our youth girls was helping out that day and after church she came up to me and gave me this little baby she had colored.

As the tears run down my cheeks, I am reminded to pray just as Hannah did and trust that God will provide. It may not be today but I am going to continue to give thanks and gratitude for what He is doing in my life.
God, please give me strength and peace during this time. Help me to not give up hope but to give it up to You. I love you Lord and I look forward to the lessons I am about to learn. Thank you for loving me unconditionally. Amen